Cosmic Slop #121: Two Sides Of Demi Lovato
As Demi Lovato releases her new album and documentary, Shaun Ponsonby investigates the relationship between Whalegate and her sister Poot.
Let’s talk about Demi Lovato.
“But, Shaun, why should we talk about Demi Lovato?” asks one of many voices in my head (the others are all saying “Kill, kill”).
Well…that’s a good question. I think I can safely bet that most of the people reading this have never thought about Demi Lovato. You may not even know what a Demi Lovato is. As far as you are aware, it could be a symptom of something. If you went to the doctor and said “I’ve got a swollen gland, horrible migranes and bit of a demi lovato”, you would probably be prescribed antibiotics.
But, no! A Demi Lovato does not signal the on-set of Lyme Disease. Demi Lovato is, in fact, a pop singer.
Not a very good one, mind. All of her songs are forgettable and she has the personality of a bland spatula. If General Zod barged into your bedroom in the middle of the night and ordered you to list all the artists who have had Top 10 hits this year under threat of certain death, you would probably forget her, and wind up being pummelled by Non.
She is promoting her new album at the moment, which she is doing by telling every journalist who will listen about her cocaine addiction. This is at odds with her previous squeaky clean image – coming out of the Disney stable and co-starring in the Jonas Brothers vehicle Camp Rock.
But it’s not the first time that the internet has been awash with stories that go against her image. Most shockingly, the story of her twin sister, Poot.
The story of Poot is one that has been making waves on the internet. Not big waves, one of those little things that barely moves the water and tends to happen while the tide is out.
Poot’s saga began just a little over two years ago. In early October 2015 – just one day before I spent yet another birthday alone – a photo of Demi was posted on Tumblr. It looked like a pretty low quality picture, her face was washed out and it was a bad angle. It doesn’t look like Demi Lovato. You probably don’t know what she does look like, but trust me, it’s not exactly like that.
The curious caption beneath it reads; “Demi’s twin sister. She was locked in a basement her whole life. This picture was taken the first time she went outside. Her name is Poot.”
As the story developed, it was alleged that it was Demi who kept Poot hostage, Fritzl style, in her basement. In a very real way, Poot has become a symbol for suffering and survival to a small group on Reddit or something.
Demi wasn’t happy.
But the internet embraced Poot, and there was serious buzz about her career opportunities now that she was free.
This would be curious enough, but the events that transpired just one year earlier only throw more light on the subject.
A fan posted an account of an unpleasant experience she had with Demi on social media.
Yes. Demi was accused of being a total “Britney Bitch” to a young fan at a meet and greet, consistently calling her fat, flicking her vagina and running out of the room after her making whale noises.
Worse still, it was alleged after the incident was “revealed” that she contacted said fan to hurl further abuse.
But she didn’t “delete it fat”, and it spread across the internet.
Did it really happen? Who is to say? If Demi was off her face as often as she has been claiming recently, then the idea of her flicking vaginas and running around making whale noises isn’t exactly far fetched.
But of course, it seems unlikely. It is undoubtedly a hoax. But the question is; who was behind it?
The answer is obvious; Poot.
Poot is real, not a figment of Tumblr’s imagination. She was kept locked in the basement for 20 years. She yearned to be free. She wanted to feel the sun on her skin, hear the birds sing and watch all of the films in the Bring It On franchise.
One day in 2014, Demi dropped her phone and it landed in the basement. Poot used the Wi-Fi to concoct this elaborate scheme; accuse her evil sister of body shaming a fan before sexually assaulting them. She was able to use this to blackmail the sister she so resented to free her from the underground bunker, where she slept on a pile of Demi’s many unsold records.
With this knowledge, Poot is an empowering figure.
I want to know more about Poot. What is she doing now? How did she survive in the basement? Which is her favourite of the films in the Bring It On franchise?
Demi has a new documentary out called Simply Complicated. As fascinating as she thinks her story is, it is nowhere near as vital as that of her neglected sister.
The BRITS really need to bring back the Outstanding Contribution to British Music Award and hand it to whoever is responsible for Ed Sheeran breaking his arm, rendering him unable to play guitar for the foreseeable future.
Metallica teaming up with Selfridges is the latest in a long line of very metal moves that they just continuously seem to make.
This article is dedicated to Andrew Nicholls for imparting to me the inspiring story of Poot Lovato.
Image from Demi Lovato’s Facebook page.